xy

so in conclusion, i was hoping that i had a really bad dream last night regarding to my muet result, but no, it was reality. i know i've reacted towards the news in a quite dramatic way, but i guess not everybody can understands everybody. even my mom,sorry mom. i didn't had any sleep last night. at all. started after i knew about the result came out and checked mine, and there goes it. im not in reality anymore. was completely awake up until now. dreaming. more of a day-dreaming, but it's in the night, so we call it night-dreaming? whatever.

although, after so much of intense pressure i've received from the result as i have mentioned earlier, someone still managed to kept me away from killing myself. someone still manage to kept me smiling. eventhough for only couple of minutes on the phone. but i'm still injured, my left hand was a bit burned by something. hm.

i have decided to deactivate my facebook acc, on purpose. for the better i guess? i mean, we all have to admit that it took almost all day for us to facebook-ing if we sum up all the total hours we've logged in to our fb acc. i guess i gotta be more real. i've seen so many adverts that tries so bad to kill this ever-so-outnumbering-social-network, so i should support it as i only be a partial part of the supportive people to stop facebook from be part of our culture.

i skipped class today, of course, but i had no sleep, of course? i guess i still can't go out and face the people that will asked me,what did i get for my muet result, or it will be another bummer day for me. about eating? i'll probably go eat or something later. alone. i like being alone for this type of moment. i know i will recover anytime soon as i always does, i mean im not an emo person to stay emo that long, so i gotta get back to normal and shape myself to be a better man! hopefully by then, i'm still alive. after all, today isn't really much of a busy day with classes. only lecture for Macro and computer lab, we don't have our chemistry experiment today, so yeay!

i would like to apologise to anyone that i have ignored last night, nothing in particular, many miscalls and IMs, i've received from numerous of friends including my families to cheer me up. basically only asking me,"why you?:/" or "chillax". it really does help guys,"thanks."

i can't really call myself entirely an idiotic because i know the boundaries of being a sad person.i won't commit a suicide, let's hope. but i still can't believe about it though. i'm actually surprised that i got band 3. i was aiming to get atleast band 4, but band 3 is like failing to me since english is my favourite language compared to malay. but i hope this is a huge slap on the face god gave me to wake up or something. so let's start a new fresh. ehe. :)