Saturday, May 29, 2010

Minggu Haluansiswa UM 2010

So the so called orientation day is finally over. I was expecting torturous and exhausting week but apparently it turns out to be fun. Especially when i knew that i got into some kind of groups of people performing for the closing night for Minggu Haluansiswa is even better in sound. Anyhow, like always of course the first few days i was in university malaya, its abit of a heartbreak because its been too much pressure to fit in with other geniuses and brainiacs but eventually, i manage to pull through the week with ease. moreover i found more friends than i expected, mostly semenanjung friends from different places and states. forlornly, only few sabahans were made it to um so its pretty frustrating when the population of your hometown people can only be counted by fingers. overall, the week is over.. what else can i say about it anyway and most importantly classes have already started so i just need to put my brain on academic syllabus and thats all. hopefully, my academic life would be advanced like everyone else here. insyaallah. btw, i have to dress like a peribumi-an during the night, so enjoy the photos. adios!

Monday, May 17, 2010


Oh my, I have to say. How much I have pull through so much of my energy and creativity as well as my time but I am finally finished my artwork. Its ready to be send to balai seni lukis sabah which I am sending it by myself just in a minute after posting this post. Anyhow, All those well wasted ticking seconds on the clock really paid off, I've been going back and forth asking for opinion and say about this and most of them giving me green lights about my painting. It is called "A Craftsmanship Of A Bajau Man's Undying Talent" as the big title and for the small title is "Intense Concentration". It shows that a Bajau man is carving a wood for lepa-lepa boat as their traditions for earning his living and his family. Other than that, this painting originally done by me and coached by my dear lau-xue, Ms Angie Shureena. Approximately this painting costs RM800+ but for me If it sold for 20$ is already enough. harhar. I've used water color as my medium. And hopefully I can win both regional and state level for this competition of Karya Pilihan Tahunan 2010 Negeri Sabah. Amin. Insyaallah.

Friday, May 7, 2010

le lapin reve

And I don't ever want to go home again

stocks from my goodbyes

University Malaya, KL

boulevard oh delilah. i have yet going to go through for another separation and severance with my most loved ones. my family. my friends. im leaving my hometown just in counted days to come. soon im about to step out to the real world, taking a step frontward as i will pursue my dreams in my study. i will be ongoing and enduring my educational part of my life to University Malaya, Kuala Lumpur. i barely felt excited or anything closer everytime i've said those words all in a sentence. By that means in Major of Architecture course there. everyone had long gone drowned with this big agenda but im telling about my random updates in my life now. im not sure either architecture is what im dreaming of. im not sure either this is what i wanted to do in my life. i ever once prepared an answer just in case if somewhat people would asked me about what is my ambition or anything cliche things like that. i ever dreamed on being a human race attorney in local law firm anywhere in malaysia. or not my recent new found obsession in mathematics, numbers, linears, equations have gave me an idea in being anywhere closer in the field like accountant or mathematicians. but i guess everything is all planned up already right.

on the good side of what i got is that im taking a course from a combination of two of my significance interest. art and maths. doesnt get any gnarliest than that. but thank god for giving me such opportunity, it's everything like i planned on my life blueprint. thanks to my beautiful parents that supported me like a very good enhancement tights that comforted our privates. hilarious. next my absolute downpour gratitude goes to my gorgeous family that has never been less than annoying to me. my spectacular friends that i could not list based on how bizillion uncounted amount of them. to anyone and everyone that knew me. thanks. wish me a good luck in there.


different venture in different world

although things are different in every ways. giving hard time on being to build up verdicts and last-calls. eventually ended up standing at the same spot where you left all exertion that was there on the first place. if you don't comprehend or understand what is the world means to you. then look through it with me and see how i look and see how the world means a whole lot to me. my lights were totally different. sometimes it gives me spirit, sometimes it tends to kick my ass to the pits of wreckage and desolation. but life isn't left to be defined because life is just another word for human existence to realize the circles of dark and bright holes breathed-perfect-organed creature god created,which is us. by all meaning, life is just another path for us to go through and have all memories bring along with us as our only precious treasures. life is meant to be walked on for us to give back what god had gave us. all the questions that always left being issued and questioned. full of perplexity and overtiredness. so think again.


clock shows 12:20 am in the midnight, 27 degree Celsius temperature. im having some serious conversations with some voices murmuring through the unsettling utterance in my head. talking on and on and on. fervor all mixed up like a beautiful proportioned cooked meal, like color puzzled match-toys. i had found the worse visual rather than looking at death itself. im now enjoying my everyday milk as always but now like staring as if there were tonnes of ladybugs inside my glass. stirring yet revolting. i saw a page full of pains and tenderness sore. it was a consequences for bad-intentions doing. i was planning to look through someone's page but ended up seeing her natter or talk with another person. every now and then i kept thinking why does all this shoddier bustle is happening on me. maybe because god is proving to me the high and low altitude of life. god have been treating me like the supposed intense care a sick patient would've get from a nurturing doctor. so well,that it has placed me in complete confusion. mystification. guiding me to the way of life. the right way of life. im very sorry toward my wrong doing to you lil girl. im sorry for the last song i sang to you during our ceremonial day together. i hardly forgets you especially when you were on my head all the time. far how i worked so hard, hard till my tachycardia anxiety attacks me again, trying so hard to put you away from my life. how you have been influenced my life. how you have been the biggest part of my life. bigger than my family themselves. i should take all the blames, it was all my fault. but please. falling in love wasn't just Romeo & Juliet to me anymore. it was more than priceless artworks an artist would create. more magical than that. more than wonders of the world. how i missed your laughter that filled my stomach like starch and protein fill my day just like carbs to carry on my day with energy. you light my soul. im all dim and dark now. initially or internally im indescribably impaired but externally i have to go through days without smile were meant to show on the right time. i was smiling when people were sad and happens the other way around when people were happy. you make me fall in love. i hated how i conceived both of us still together as friends, although limitations always come across first before anything else.

i know im not good enough for you. but believe me, im always deeply sorry for what i have done to you. putting you in position where you were separated chose neither good way nor better way. im tumbling down. running out matches to light on my soul with count-down candle.

I've done my performances to you.
I deserve a standing ovation from you. only you.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

credit to hellsley

zhen bang!xie xie leyley

sunflower seeds for dinner and sunshine for breakfast

well its another post from photography outing with hellsley and the original old folk, vivien :) having blast time than before because got to learned more stuffs. but forlornly, i didnt get the chance to have my photoshop editor because ley misdiagnosed the software for me. it was in spanish, great. i wonder,how is the condition would've been after raining could be more interesting right. this is another reason that kept me from going to kl soon, it wouldn't be everyday amazing anymore to capture noteworthy shots. we all got our desired snaps last night, pretty wicked. either it was me was too fatigue last night or we've caught wonderful photos when we were in the tunnel. it was ghostlike. a phantom experience i never aspired to recapture. but not until my battery pack was running out of energy i stopped taking shots afterward. more photos will be uploaded but in altered posts. however enjoy.


vivien hellsley

faves of the night