inaptness

I'm really bad when it comes to updating my blog regularly & i hate myself when i can't do anything about it. so, the 10days of hols back at home was a total relieved, like the right feeling after you've farted, everything seems to be fresh again & thats how i felt abt my hols, went awesome! here are some photographs i've taken when i was out to the malls & practically everywhere with my good friend & most perverted girl, Faw.

introducing one of the best place to eat Fish&Chips, Fish & Co.

i've became a total sucker to this place already :(

& also my fake expression of the taste of the desert.

ouh i just can't help myself from posting this photo of my cat sleeping, Blacky has this thing with my bed in my room. he likes it! & guess what, he doesn't even noticed i was at his side at this moment, he was too swayed by his sleepiness. naww

KLIA (f*king) express

screammmmm everybody! yes, the day is finally here! im in the airport (current location), alone of course, just had to go through a really rough day started with a cab that back out on me and the rain that basically makes me wet and now i've fell sick! fuck! what a way to start my day! and also i am all safe in the airport now having cafe latte in Cafe Barlera, whatever you called it, a good substitute coffee shop instead of Coffee Bean, and having my choco roll, yummy! i actually finished it before i even start to post this cs the wifi in the airport SUCKS. anyhoo, just that! im bored and sleepy, blame the weather that rain on me, shit! my camera's not with me now, sucks even more, so i guess the next time i'll update this blog, im going to be home already, Insyallah ehe. ok bye

8

so basically the Hols are starting already!

i have no other better title except for that, so for dear readers sorry for making all my posts very clunt and boring cs of that, blame my sugar rush to type the content of the title instead of thinking about the title itself, god whatever im rambling now. anyways, today has been the happiest day compared to any day i am/was here because of these few things :

first, my class has finally ended for now to allow the holiday kicks in its wicked balls.

second, we as in me,ac,amal,mai and oney was planning about having a trip after we finished our exam, literally right after exam to where? PULAU TIOMANNNNNNNNNNNN. fuck yeah we're awesome! all the rough planning and thoughts are still under brainstorms, so we need to come up each with our own proposal to present it to each other about it, to have you know, official plan about it. YEAH IM FUCKING EXCITED!

third, what a coincidence! third, damn, 3 has to be my fave number now, my THIRRDDD assignment for basic design basically got an A, not that i want to boast or anything but i am HAPPPYYYY AND RELIEVEEEDD abt it cs i finally got an A for something and they really liked it, i drew an Indian woman and we gotta do all the relief techniques and whatever, i'll post the picture of the painting later and they liked my presentation, the lecturers liked how my Eng was nice and fluent.

fourth, we had our little last reunion before holiday in Wendy's just now although Ac and Mai couldn't make it, they had their time up pretty fast here so it was only left me,Oney (and her bf) and Amal.

all in all, i had a blast closuring day before i had my own holiday. i have been working on plans and whatever to fill up this coming AWESOME hols, so can't wait to do it! so later! :)

Noob

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hi guys, i know, it's been like what, a day since the last time i posted in my blog. i know Noob! i can't do anything else except either checking my blog or updating it, Noober! since now i have reactivated my fb, nothing says a fresh new start so im gona be fully distracted by that thing all over again, or won't I? i found myself a lil bit too drown in the facebook wave so i've decided to put my profile private so that people can't get me through in anyway even though they still have all my status to comment on,Noob but ain't that Rocket science?! har har. perhaps im sober now with fb. damn i'm pathetic.

it has been one freaking a-hole day doing nothing at all, just yammering to myself in my room all alone without any accompany,Fuck! and eating by myself, i've been like a loner for quite sometimes now so i guess i shouldn't do that or whatever. im not thinking about anything now! gosh my life's so complicated!

oh i do actually, about home. im a few more days left before flying back home. im freakin excited since i can forget about the shit im dealing here whatsoever for a little while. 1o days without kl somehow relieved my over drive senses, i don't even know what that means. i can't bear myself without losing my sanity here, i've been fucking stoke in kl! in this shitty place we call University! i hate all the works given by our lecturers, i hate all the assignments, giving me headache continuously! god i hate studying all and all! but i guess nobody can understand me with that right!

fuck it!

i am thinking of vlogging, you know that new thing where people update their life in youtube by uploading their personal funny videos they've recorded themselves, no? i know its not new so thats why im about to call myself a fucking Noob again. anyways, yeah thinking of doing that. but i don't have any good quality cameras to record my video, well im gona try at least do one video i promise! haha. i really need to see myself just out there spilling about my shitty life even though nobody wants to hear it except for myself.

& yeah thats pretty much it, i can't believe i did more than 20 posts within this month alone. that means im fucking bored with my life but i should think about people in Africa more and take my words back!

oh and im hungry now but not anymore after listening to 500 Days of Summer soundtracks i've downloaded, i've watched the movie (had a lil movie marathon last night) and New York, I Love You, god the movie is sweeettttttt. as in both ways,sweeeeeettttt!! i have few other movies left to be watch so i'm full! haha. so i guess i'll catch up later aligators. x

say homies!

i am distant by a few more days of Holiday

despite having this loads of shit burden on my shoulder up until now, exams are stil not finish by the end of this weekdays. i've received numerous of calls and IM's from my friends basically asking me when am i coming home, I'll be flying exactly on this Sunday guys, and be staying for approximately 10 days back home. i've purposely extended the days so that i wont be losing any valuable times at Sabah, just for the fun of it. this post has really no direction whatsoever haha.

let us talk about exams, today is Wednesday, making it the third day of exam out four day which is the last day is tomorrow. yay! first day was Phy&Chem 2 Paper and Macroeconomics, nothing surprised me with the questions except the awkward moment i got,the first time i've laid my eyes on the first question in each paper. bummer! and second day was ruined by Stats&Probability.

so far i really have nothing much to say about it, yeah been pretty difficult to answer it well but whatever, that's just how i felt throughout all the exams here. doesn't give a damn! either A's or likewise,i'll stil be feeling neutral about the exams.

and like most pathetic weeks i have consumed in my life throughout the 2nd sem, this week have no exception BS and there's class on Sat. major bummer! cannot ask for anymore miseries than this, i've been having alot less talk than i could imagine cs my head isn't around anymore,been keeping thinking of home and at another point i've become obsessed of going home.i can't wait to meet tv,families,home-made cooks,MY ONE AND ONLY BED,friends, nothing but sweet mother fugger Reunion. til now, bye!

as we age

so i hate myself when i am awake and caused by none other than another stupid sleepless attempt-insomiac attack again. but this time is different. today i had spent yet another day with my sister, we were finishing where we have left before when she was around and Eja did an appointment with me again today with Yazid to walk around town. nothing fancy, just food, us, some fever and car fuels. besides that, the only thing that kept bothering me is my family. bothering me in a good way.

as i tried to sleep after the day trails off to an end, i re-captured the blissful moments when i was with my family. from that moment, i really shouldn't be even trying to sleep cs whenever i think of them, i'l either smile or cry (of happiness). but this time i cried. i miss them so badly, this anticipation of going back home is wildy alluring toward my senses and making my brain stop functioning well.

then again i remembered my preggar sister, Diwi whom is a few more months away before welcoming a brand new 3rd generation of our family. then, i have magically seen the faces of my parents. filled with ease, relieved and somewhat happy and just not any words can become a comparison.

then, i was thinking, how can time passes by so fast. the last thing i remembered when i was a little kid, running around under my dad's pants, pushing my neighbour's shoulder one another, taking bath together outside of the house, and now i am looking down to my dad, talking as if i am a genetically grown human being compared to my dad. i hate to see bad surprises coming out from my parents faces, that is wrinkles. i am at my happiest to see laugh lines grows like mushroom plant instead.

everytime i go back and finally able to see them and hold their head on my palm gives me such awakening experience on how i should take life more meaningful. i love my parents uncomparably as how much i love all my siblings are. they are basically my life, take one of them away, and you'll see me dying, literally.

im not even sure, why suddenly the matter of family appeared in my head but it has gave me an impact on how i should learn more and appreciate more on basically everything. when i rolled myself to see me doing this all, i was hoping to have a gun by my side and burst my brain out from it, i don't come here just to please whoever i think i should, i come here to please them, my families, to help them, my families. as much ignorance or whatever you call it i have put to the worthless life i've gave here, i am still somehow fragile inside and optimistic within.

i wish for a truthful wake up call would wake me up from this uneasy disturbance so that i could keep that in my mind, keep my family in my mind, all the time.

living in a thousand days of solitude

i want a pure, honest, strong support. like the snow flake. like the silver crumble.

today in chemistry class

i was just so depressed of myself, thinking why am i so incomprehensible. i can't cope anything just in a snap of seconds, or maybe i am just unnaturally dyslexic. i refuse to learn, my heart is closed. hypothetically. please God, show me the way. the better way to study and get things more clearer. and faster. i want this thing to end so badly. come on, i want this to end. i will somehow, keep on trying to not humiliate myself. i will.

Please, please please, let me get what I want

Coffee Bean's hot drink straw looks like an infinity or number 8. wow
solitude

luminosity

and those are snapshots of my second Basic Design assignment. we have to do a plane structural form, and mine is like that. i'm glad Prof. liked it. smile.

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She & Him

so my sister is in town for several weeks attending her work course, i'm happy for you dear to get a job for yourself in a place that's full with money! i regretted for her limitation of moment in time with me on the day we've met, because she's living in Serdang so she have to go back before twilight. but still,Midvalley has eventually filled our content and happy moments together. i am dearly missing our family already! x

okay i can't come up with a title

so i am about to sleep because the clock shows 0211 am in the morning, i should be sleeping, or it'll be impossible to get up for class tomorrow. talk about class, can you believe the fact that we have class tomorrow?! well, not that in my concern about it cs i pratically don't give a fuck about it, cs what's the point of whining anyway? and in fact, Saturday class isn't bad at all. (i was lying)

anyhow, i promised too many things already, i've mentioned something about posting a list on what i wana do after i've finished my foundation year but i still haven't done it yet, so before i am about to promise anything else, i want to deal with this one first.

to be quite frank,i haven't decide on what shall i be doing during the long break, perhaps only a few stuffs i am planning to do besides eat,sleep,and tv, GOD I MISS TV namely, attending Art class to my previous art teacher, or probably making some paintings (?) or getta part time job because i'm trying to save up some money to get my teeth a braces. wouldn't it be fun!

i know right, that's maybe alot to juggle, i guess i just have to see how things will go later. so whatever, my aim now is to get a full 4.00 for this sem. why am i jumping topics,i dont even know why, seesh. it'll be hard but im sure nothing is impossible. haha, weeeiiirrdd. because Architecture is not an easy course, or i'll be ended dumped in other faculties. so i better swot up those books and start studying! later. ok, im insane

blame my pen

i was doodling in my sketchbook, illustrated some (for me) cool images,shapes,patterns etc and i suddenly started to do a pen-made tattoos, was just experimenting. i mean,if only i can make tattoos, this will probably be some designs i am interested with. the birds and the equal symbol. dearly meaningful in my taste. it was very roughly drawn on my skin but still, looks good for me. ehe.

Messenger in Disguise

photos are taken in different type of occasions and taken by me, ofcourse. enjoy.

x