Not that I want to mention names nor cases, but somehow I just feel this situation just came popped in one of my brain cells and turned off every single happy activity in my body. Friends. Yes, that's what it is, feels good to finally be able to point out what's been bothering me all this while, well, not that while though. I have plenty of friends, goods, bads, friends that I don't even remember we are friends, and anything in between, but if you are a good friend, don't break my heart, don't offend me in anyway.
Seriously, I don't wana start the I-am-actually-this-kinda-guy session but just one thing for sure, Angry or Mad or Pissed off or any words related aren't my thing. I don't get upset that easily. That much even. I just keep it to myself and when I am utterly depressed, you would see it through my sketch/drawings and that means BAD. Friends are meant to be categorized as someones you would be comfortable with to talk about anything, to laugh about anything, or anything about anything. It's not the total freedom I need in order to be comfy with you, It's the carefree I want whenever I feel like doing/talking/whatevs.
Don't actually realized I am breaking this down to "types" of friends I have, but next in my forever-friends-problems is neglectfulness from my friends. Like seriously, I know I'm all boring and stupid and financially poor to most society out there but don't just find me when you're alone. When you need someone to tell your secret about. Do I look like I care? NO.
What I care is when we both at least act like being friends or whatever, (just got a whole different thing now) have our own time together.
All I'm saying is that, If you wana do FUN or HANG-OUTS, don't just find me in your yellow-pages service in your phone to call me out whenever you feel in need, find me when you want to spend time with me, you know like the quality time people are talking about? Yes, that. Just because you have a boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't mean that you need to take care of his/her feelings more when I asked you out just cause I don't have their permission. FUCK. I just don't get what's the point.
And to those have like RULES AND REGULATIONS for me to be your friend, well hear this, FUCK YOURSELF ON THE TABLE, what are you, the messenger of God for me to take care of that things? and just cause you have the coolest fuck-buds in your place, don't mean I need to be as bullshit as them either. Fuck you and your perfection-ness.
I am.. obviously upset now, funny thing is, there's a quote saying, "a good friend is a friend need indeed" but now I am talking dirt on "friends". Funny. Don't be offended or anything if you're reading this.
Before getting to your phone and start texting me saying, "Suck your own cock!", Well this is just another random whine from me, maybe I just remembered my past, that's why everything just got heat up in my head or maybe t'was something else, I don't know, I need a.... friend. Sorry but seriously, this post is not referring to anybody, don't get touchy and all okay. Just being human here.
Peace. x
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